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Monday, 24 November 2008

  • And now I'm pissed

    So I went to change my username cuz its old and I don't even go to the school that it is associated with. And Xanga wants to charge me $10 to change my name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  How ludicrous is that?!!??!?!? I mean honestly that is the dumbest, studpidest, most asinine, ridiculous thing I have ever heard of in my entire 26 years of being on this early planet!!!!!!!!!!  And I have heard some asinine, ridiculous things (like Tech was going to beat OU this weekend, I mean please!!!!  Didn't happen, wasnt' going to!)  But this just takes the cake. I mean really, of all the stinking nerve!!!!!!!!!
  • A New Day

    It is a new day. My crying spell from last night is over. I feel better. I went to see my friend Angela last night, who actually lives about 45 minutes away. Just a quick trip and back. For those who don't know, I live in Texas(in case you couldn't tell), and an hour trip is very quick. Literally down the road. :) But anyway, we got to talk last night about the stuff I am struggling with. It was very reassuring to get alot of stuff off my heart. And today has actually been a really good day. My problem though is that I'll start with a really good day and then by the end of the week, I fall back into my old habits. This is what bothers me the most about myself. I struggle with breaking bad habits. Possibly why I don't smoke. Some of you who read this might think I'm judgmental or being too harsh on myself, but I'm not. My actions are not the actions of the woman I was raised to be. My actions are not the actions of who I want to be, and who I have been, and who I know I can be.

    What I have been struggling with the most lately is God and guys. I haven't gone to church in a few months, which is a big deal for me. From a few months ago back for four years, I was going to church every week, active member in my Sunday School class and church choir. Almost 5 years ago now, my fiance called off our engagement and ended our four year relationship out of the blue. It devastated me to say the least. I completely changed after that. I was reckless, I quit going to class, I drank and stayed out all night. I met and made out with random guys. Sometimes it went a bit further than making out. And finally the depression got to me one night in my dorm room. I had a bottle of Aleve in my hand ready to swallow the whole thing, when I realized that while my ex would be sad if I died, it wouldn't change anything. He wouldn't be remorseful about breaking up with me. He would maybe mourn me for awhile but he would get on with his life. And so instead of swallowing those pills, I fell on my face before God and cried out for forgiveness. I've still struggled with depression since then, but God has been more real to me.

    Not that I've been a perfect Christian since then. I have stumbled in those same areas so many times since then, but up til lately I've always been able to get back on track. And all of a sudden lately, I haven't wanted to get back on track. My friend hit it on the head last night. She said I've been apathetic about God. And she's right. I have. I haven't cared about church or choir or my church friends. Part of me is very hurt because none of those friends has called to check on me, or emailed me, or Facebooked me to see if I'm ok. And that really bothers me. But lately I have been so caught up in self-gratification and getting the physical attention from guys, that I've been pushing God away. And too that's because I know what I have been doing is wrong. I feel guilty for my actions but I don't want to change, so I don't go to church or surround myself with people who I know will tell me I'm doing wrong.

    But now I think I have finally gotten to that point. Today was a new day. I didn't read a book with scenes in it that are specifically written to sexually turn the reader on. I didn't think about lingerie and whatever guy I met this weekend (mainly because I didn't go out this weekend). And that's another thing. I have always said I love to go dancing just to dance with my girlfriends. But for the past several weeks, if I didn't manage to find a guy, it hasn't been as fun. Or if I didn't look sexy, I didn't have as much fun. I didn't go last weekend because I didn't want to put on some sexy top and makeup. I didn't go Saturday night because I didn't want to deal with the guys. Its changed. I still love to dance, don't get me wrong. That will never change. But until my mindset is right, until I can have fun on my own in a Tshirt, I need to be careful. I have to guard my heart better than what I've been doing . And I need to guard my purity and my body better too. What is the point of meeting a guy at a bar? I've always known that is not the way to meet a godly Christian man. So why am I specifically looking for a boyfriend in a bar? I know better than that.

    I want to change. I am ready for change. As I said before, I will not meet the man of my dreams until I become the woman of his. And I'm not changing because I want to hurry up and get married. That's not how it works, I know that. I truly desire to know God better. I truly desire to seek Him and hunger for Him, and to want His best for my life as a single woman. I know I am still going to desire a boyfriend and a husband. But not before God's timing. Because in God's perfect timing, I will meet a man who will treasure me as John treasures my beautiful friend Kayla, a man who will wash my feet.

Sunday, 23 November 2008

  • Slap in the heart

    I was part of a wedding this weekend. My friend Kayla married her boyfriend of many years (since high school) last night in a beautiful little country church, surrounded by her family and many, many friends. In fact, we had to turn people away. The church was packed to the point of standing room only and even then, we had to turn people away. I was part of her house party, friends from college who helped with programs, guest book, directing traffic, that sort of thing. It was such an honor to see this amazing woman marry the man of her dreams. They both are so in love with God and so in love with each other. They have honored each other throughout their entire relationship, and this was the culmination of all their dreams and hard work. There was a part of the ceremony, after they lit the Unity candle and took Communion together, that Kayla was sitting on a bench and John knelt at her feet, and washed them. I started crying then. If you're reading this and think that's weird, the washing of feet is a biblically symbolic act of servantitude. At the Last Supper, Christ washed His disciples feet, demonstrating that He had been sent to the earth to be a servant to His people, not the warrior king the Israelites expected their Messiah to be. For Kayla and John, it was John's way of showing Kayla that he would do his best to love her and serve her, as Christ loved and served the Church. It was truly breathtaking and heartbreaking.

    On Friday, I went to pick up my dress that I had made for the wedding. Side note: Kayla asked us to wear brown dresses as part of the wedding colors, and I could not find a brown dress. However, I know a lady from church who is a seamstress and I had a great vintage pattern. When I went to pick it up, we got to talking about dating and relationships. She told me that her daughter didn't get married until she was 30, and up til then, she really hadn't dated much. Her last relationship had really hurt her. Now, my last relationship also really hurt me, but that has not deterred me from dating in the least. I've always been a get-back-on-the-horse kinda gal. And I've never bought into the whole wait-til-God-drops-a-man-in-your-lap frame of mind either. But she said something to me that really struck my heart. She said, "By looking for the guy and trying to find the guy, you take your gaze off of Jesus. And when you're dividing your heart and your focus between Jesus and searching, you're not wholly focused on Him."

    This is not something new for me. I have known actually for quite sometime that by actively looking to meet men, I'm really just pushing back the time that I'll meet my husband. Does this make sense? Let me put it this way. I know God has a special man out there for me. And I know that in God's own time, He will lead this man to me and vice versa. But until I am the woman He has created me to be and until he is the man He has created him to be, we won't meet or realize we are meant to be together. As much as I desire to meet my husband, and as much as I desire to be married and to raise my family, I'm not ready for it. I am not the Christian woman I need to be to help my husband and be a good mother. I am not mature enough or godly enough. I would only be a hindrance to him. And it is literally breaking my heart to write this. I have said many times that I can't get over my ex-fiance until I find a man to replace him in my heart. And that's not true. All I need is Jesus. And I have Him if I would just reach out to Him. But I've been pushing Him aside for so long.

    I'm sorry I really need to go right now and I'll finish this later.

Tuesday, 18 November 2008

  • Hate this feeling

    I am normally a very patriotic person. I love my country. I love the Star Spangled Banner. I love the history of our country. I love everything this country stands for. Until the day we put that man in office. All of a sudden, I don't feel like an American anymore. I have such a sense of foreboding that America is going to hell in a handbasket. And I do feel like there isn't that much we can really do. We can protest and yell and rage all we want. Are the beaurocrats (totally butchered the spelling) going to listen? No. They never do. They never have. All any of them are worried about is how much power they have and how much money they make. I hate our president to-be, and have absolutely no allegiance whatsoever.

    I think Texas should secede.

Monday, 10 November 2008

  • So I've been taking the time to go back over all that I've written. In all honesty, alot of it makes me sad because I'm not as close to God as I was then. I think part of it then was He was all I had. I shouldn't say that, He is still really all I have now. Its been over 3 years since I've written alot of that. I read it and remember many of those times. I remember the depression and the uncertainty of relationships and the feelings that I was never going to get on with my life. And unfortunately I don't think I can say that things have changed much. There have been more guys since then, mostly bad decisions, still haven't graduated, and at times still depressed. I want the right guy to come along, but I know he's not going to. I'm not the right girl. I know what I need to change and what I need to do, but I don't want to do it. I literally just don't want to do it. I don't necessarily like who I am. But I feel like I'm stuck like this, at least for a little while. And right now I don't want to change. That scares me too. What if its too late by then? What if I miss my chance? What if I settle for less? I was reading back over a blog that I had poured my heart out over a guy. And another guy wrote back this really sweet message. But I don't want sweet messages and platitudes. I want a husband. I want a guy to fall for me. I don't want to be called a "dear sister". I just want to be called "dear".

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saderbabe07

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    • Name: Jennifer
    • Location: Waco, Texas, United States
    • Birthday: 7/21/1982
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 6/27/2005

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  • Oh wow, I don't know anymore. I'm still trying to figure my life out, what I want from myself and for my future. Like I say on Facebook, I love Project Runway and shoes. Everything else is superfluous.

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